i was skunked

i took a picture of two deer out by my pool the other day. it reminded me of a time when pug and i had just been married. i was at home doing my domestic goddess and wicked-step-mother duties. it was early and i glance out the kitchen window.  i saw two deer not just in the woods, but in my yard. i was filled with excitement. i am a country girl and know all about the outdoors but have never lived where i could see deer in my yard. so what was my first thought, i have to call pug and tell him... he will never believe this.... what was i thinking! i did call and my excitement was overwhelming. my sweet husband just said "is that why you called me?" and i replied why yes of course. he laughed and told me that he sees that ALL the time. thanks for busting my bubble so early in the morning and in our marriage. it is still a joke and i sometimes have to call him and tell him again just to remind him how lucky we are!! i have had the pleasure of seeing many critters in our yard. not just a few deer but actual herds of deer, herds of turkey, gophers, foxes, coyotes, cows, lots of snakes and once i saw a bobcat with a rabbit in his mouth. i guess everyone has to eat. but my most interesting was a skunk. and of course there is a story. i woke up in the middle of the night to a strange smell. at first it smelled like electrical wires burning. i woke pug and we checked out the house and found out we had a skunk outside. the smell was so strong that is seemed to be coming from in the house but we saw nothing. the next day i looked around outside and found a hole dug under our bedroom window. not good. it reeked of skunk. we knew where it was now. we had to figure out how to get him gone. one Sunday after church we got home and the garage smelled exceptionally bad.  all skunked up. upon further inspection i found the skunk sleeping behind our boot box right by out front door. i was quickly reminded of a favorite cartoon as a child pepe' lapeau. that cool skink who was so charming and cute, but he also stunk really bad. i quickly learned that this was no pepe'. skunks are nocturnal and i knew he would not want to be moved but i had to try. by I , i definitely mean me, nobody else would even attempt this.  i had to save my family from this stinky villain. i was armed with a broom. i gently persuaded him to come out from behind the box and he only got as far as the next corner. he kept wanting to go to sleep. finally i gave a harder push and that is when he turned, tail up in the air and let me have it. i was kind of ready and out of the way but i was still not prepared for the magnitude of the stink. luckily it did not get on me. i have heard from someone in the past that once a skunk sprays it takes a while to reload up his skunk juice. so i am thinking that this is my moment to get him out for good. i not quite as gently as before push him with my broom and get him just about out of the garage and that is when it happened. he turned, tail up and i am thinking you are only shooting blanks buddy but i was WRONG. someone had either given me the wrong info or my particular skunk has a super sonic skunk juice filler upper. he sprayed again and this time i was not out of range. he got my broom and may arm. just a light spray feeling. but he might has well sprayed me in the face. i could fill it in my nose hairs. it made me gag and cough and i could taste it and i thought i was going to throw up. needless to say he sashayed out of the garage and into the woods. luckily we had covered his hole so he was gonna have to look for another home. preferably far far away from me. i washed, and showered and body sprayed. i could still taste it in my lungs when i took a breath. sorry to be gross but when i tinkled it smelled of skunk. kind of freaked me out. i went to the movie with a friend and kept asking her all day if she smelled it... she said no but i think she was just being a friend.  it took a while to wear off. my skunk removal days are probably not over, we have spotted several since then but none in the garage. i will be better prepared this time and remember that skunks are quick to reload, or at least mine was.